as written on; Monday, September 10, 2007

Whoopeedoo. [Chingy]

Ugh. I hate myself. I should've seen this coming a mile away. Scratch that. I should've seen this even before I got into it. Fuck it. Why did I believe that he'd be different? Why did I fucking fall for him in the first fucking place? This is just so fucked up. I feel like a bloody rebound right now, and I've every right to feel this way, since I am a bloody rebound. Ugh, why did you make me fall so hard and not catch me? God. Insensitive asshole. I've tried letting go countless of times but what good did it do for me? Nothing. Why? Because I've always believed that there was a reason behind every wrong doing. Hell was I wrong. Just tell me, why the fuck did you even ask if it was going to end this way?

So tell me one good reason why I shouldn't let go now, I dare you.

------

I sprained my ankle today during netball. =P So, now Gwen and I are the 'Limping Park' instead of 'Linkin Park'. Hahah! Sue us for being lame, but I love her to no end. <3>

I miss talking to Naomi and Nathan. I need them right now, right this very second. They always manage to lighten the situation no matter how awkward or fucked up it is.

I basically just need someone to talk to right now. Anyone up to be my counselor for a change? 'Cause I'm quite tired of being everyone's counselor when I have my own problems to deal with already. It's not that I mind being their counselor, because I actually like it. Makes me feel special and good that I'm actually doing something to help the person. But now, I just need a counselor or anyone up to listen to my endless rants, screams and cries.

xoxo, Chingy.

i realize that i crave for a lot of things when i'm 'depressed' or whatever. heh.

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